


AU: Show me Florence, Hannibal

by Lecterism



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Hannibal Advent, Hannibal Castle, Hannibal's past, Kinda fluff, Lithuania - Freeform, M/M, Mild Smut, Murder Husbands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-28
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-03 16:48:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5298857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lecterism/pseuds/Lecterism
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will fails to stick to his plan to catch Hannibal in Italy. Instead, he allows him to show him Florence as their ultimate farewell.<br/>But what if he just can't say goodbye?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Story occurs mid-Dolce (3x06) so I extracted the first four lines from the episode to make clear the moment when the alternative events happen.

 

"Freeing yourself from me and me freeing myself from you, they are the same."

"We're conjoined. I'm curious whether either of us can survive separation."

"Now is the hardest test: not letting rage and frustration nor forgiveness keep you from thinking. Shall we?"

"After you."

Hannibal had risen, then turned his head to look at one of his favourite pieces of art. If it wasn't his favourite, it was certainly the most significative. He could clearly see now his end in his beginnings.

"I would have liked to show you Florence, Will." He truly lamented. That and having to leave Italy after having found such peace in it for a while.

Out of the blue, Will gave him an answer not even himself could have foreseen:

"Then show me Florence."

Hannibal stood arguably impassive. Probably trying to determine whether if Will was joking or setting the worst, cheapest trap he had ever come across. None of the options seemed plausible given the circumstances. As much as Hannibal would gesticulate, he arched his eyebrows -or the place where they were supposed to be.

"Jack and I have already paid Bedelia a visit." Will told him. "You can't go back there, although it seemed clear to me that you have already packed your stuff."

Hannibal didn't reply and he wasn't going to. Nor give him one bit of information that could possibly differ from the version Bedelia had told them to protect herself.

"Did you come all the way to Florence to do some sightseeing, Will?" He probed getting only a smile in the form of an answer. "You came here to catch me, didn't you?"

"That was the plan." Will introduced both his hands inside his pockets, followed by Hannibal's eyes. "But you just said you'd like to show me Florence. As a friend, I'm being considerate enough to give you the chance to say goodbye and do it nicely this time. It's entirely up to you to take it or not." He tried his best to convey indifference with his countenance.

He didn't feel indifferent but delighted. It had taken them so long to meet again that the ends of their reencounter started to blur for Will at the very sight of Hannibal.

"What makes you think I won't kill you?" He didn't wander off the point.

Hannibal's eyes went back up to Will's when he felt it was safe to do so. He looked as fierce as he did in Will's dreams. He had seen him in them almost every night during the last months. Never stopped to consider he could be somewhat obsessed with his former psychiatrist.

"I... don't think" He scoffed.

"You planned this." Hannibal wasn't settling so easily. "I'm sure your mind has presented you scenarios in which you found me and gave me an end."

Always fantasizing about the ways Will would end him. Maybe both of them could still use some therapy sessions together, since it was obvious being apart didn't help.

"Let's say plan has miscarried a little now that I've seen you."

"Why is that?"

Hannibal appeared to be genuinely intrigued, interested.

Will sighed at his question. He either didn't have the answer or he just couldn't tell him.

"We haven't gotten so far just to go back to psychoanalyzing me now, have we?" He chuckled. "Are you going to show the city or are we going to stand here for the rest of the day?

  

* * *

 

 

The Uffizi gallery was on the banks of the river Arno. Piazza del Duomo was only six minutes away and close to it was the Basilica di San Lorenzo. The latter was a Renaissance church, burial place of the Medici, with a library designed by the master Michelangelo himself. Of course Hannibal wanted Will to see. There were too many places he would have taken Will but so little time and energy. The two of them were wounded and found themselves short of breath several times throughout the tour Hannibal had put up for them. Florence was remarkable, a place Will wouldn't forget. It was hard to believe after so much they had lived together, he still had much more to learn from Hannibal.

It took quite some time going from landmark to landmark, looking for shelter in the shade of every two alleys in their way to regain strengths. Looking for shelter or just hiding from la Polizia and Jack, they wouldn't put it in words. They wouldn't think about it or at least they simply avoided telling the other. If that was their final "goodbye" it wasn't to be overshadowed once again, not by any of them. They were meant to cherish not think and in those moments when Will suceeded, it felt the happiest he had been in months.  
He was whole-heartedly happy to see Hannibal, to be with him. It was once that they were together again that he realized nothing had truly changed between them - despite the scars. In his mind, Will was battling, trying too hard to be a fool and pretend Hannibal's presence didn't give meaning to every single minute of his life. That he didn't make it worth living.

"Stop that." He whispered to himself, not conscious until Hannibal noticed.

"Stop what?"

"I wasn't talking to you."

"... Are you feeling unstable again, Will?" Hannibal worried.

It made Will laugh between gasps.

"No, I'm afraid this is the most stable version of me that's available. Featuring irrationality and all that sort of elements. That's my own kind of sanity."

Hannibal smiled to him. He, more than anyone else, had always approved of Will embracing all aspects of his psyche as they were.

"Come on, there is some place else we should visit before we part. I don't think I'll see Florence again any time soon. Or ever again." He decided to put it in bittersweet words.

Seeing how much Hannibal loved it, a wave of guilt hit Will, knowing that it all had to be taken away from him.

 

* * *

 

 

"That's my hotel right there." Will pointed with his chin a while later.

It was late in the evening and only then he realized how much the plan indeed miscarried. They both had walked, sat and panted together for hours. Even laughed. Spent some quality time together and not for once... tried to kill the other. It'd be stupid to deny it crossed their minds as an option. It simply got dismissed. They were too busy enjoying each other's company, all but oblivious their time was slipping away through their fingers. So how were they supposed to act once it was all gone?

On his part, Hannibal was silent and his gaze was fixed on the younger man. The expression of his eyes, ever so hungry, fed the tension Will's words had started to build.

"I'm tired." Will let on. "Physically and mentally right now." He moistened his lips. "I don't think we can pretend anymore that we can do this for any longer. Do you, Hannibal?"

"Was the plan to tire me out, then call Jack when I couldn't run?"

Hannibal was still using mild humour. He wasn't keen yet on accepting the time lovely spent with Will was up. Was it up to Hannibal, their interactions wouldn't ever be limited by such vulgar constructs as time and distance. But it wasn't up to him.

Who was it up to, though, when Will wasn't sure he could keep up with a plan he had contradicted hours ago? Being mentally exhausted -due to the hunt that had taken him there- didn't help him come up with anything else. All that seemed to be left for him to keep up with was improvising. He accepted it, he had failed. He had had a plan but he no longer had the slightest idea of what he was supposed to do.

He stared at the man in front of him and his mind went back to the conversation he had had with Jack earlier that day. Jack had beat up Hannibal badly -and he could see it with his eyes- but he didn't kill him.

 _"Maybe I need you to."_ Jack had said.

What about what Will wanted, though? What did Will actually _need_?

Hannibal spoke again, given Will's speech went only on the inside.

"Won't you call Jack?" He insisted, almost defiant.

What would his life be like without Hannibal Lecter in it? Deleting Hannibal's existence wouldn't ever erase the mark he had left on Will. He was going to live with the reminder of Hannibal throghout his entire life, it was irrevocably printed on his skin.

"Are you expecting to see me betray you again?" He wondered and asked. "Did you... try to foresee my intentions only to get ahead of them, stick a knife in my stomach and run again?"

Will also wondered why he suddenly felt hurt all over again by the memory. He should be over it by then.

"I only have my bare hands." Hannibal answered briefly.

"And you could do anything with them." Will's eyebrows arched.

Hannibal's background wasn't the kind of record to make you feel safer just cause he didn't have an arm other than himself. That was dangerous enough.

"Anything and everything. Just like you." He pointed out. "I'm a gentleman, Will, and your friend. I'd spare ourselves a fist fight if you would do the same. It does not seem like us."

More than determinant, the conversation started becoming childish to Will. It felt as if they were waving around threats by weapons they didn't have. Conditionals, nothing definitive. He wasn't in the mood for petty games with Hannibal.

"It's chilly." Will pretended to shiver. He just wanted to move forward. "Wanna go up? There's some wine in my room. It's not reserve but it might still fit your liking."

"I am sure you must be aware a price has been put on my head. I myself rang the number once." Hannibal made a pause and looked down for a second, pensive. "I don't believe you owe your loyalty to the highest bidder, which leaves me with only one possible question to ask: is Jack waiting in your room?

Hannibal really thought Will was still sticking to some plan, didn't he? It made the latter want to chuckle. He would have if it wasn't for the fact that having sticked to any plan would have been the intelligent thing for him to do. But he just didn't, period.

Will walked up a little closer to Hannibal. The taller one didn't step back and the former leaned a bit towards him, spacing every word he said:

"I don't go around inviting men to my room." He almost whispered, then sealed his lips with a grin.

"You have just invited me."

"Yes, you're different. I'd feel special and just say  _thank you._ " Will suggested, then gave him the sassy puppy face.

Even if that implied losing part of control about his own situation, Hannibal was a curious man. His natural curiosity made him want to see what would Will do and took him to his hotel room.

 

Half the bottle was gone. Will had taken his shoes off and both sat on the edge of the queen size bed. They talked about unimportant things, Dante's vision of Hell, the "pricks" at the studiolo and the many languages Hannibal could speak. Will tried to learn some italian but alcohol wouldn't let anything but gibberish come out of his mouth. Hannibal found it amusing. He was smiling all the time and smiling big. The little teeth that had chewed so many people were showing all the time but Will wasn't thinking about that precisely. He had missed the sound of his quiet laugh and Hannibal had missed laughing.

Will was curious too about the man he was laying eyes on again after so long. He could see him clearer now. He could see the halo of their friendship glow under the distracting layers of perils and cons. What he had with Hannibal was beautiful from an amoral take. Or maybe it wasn't amoral but just off the standards. Hannibal had his own morale where their relationship was anything but wrong. Questioning it for answers sake was what made Will more and more exhausted every time. He never came up with the one he wanted to tell himself.

A moment of silence between the two men gave Will the oportunity to hear his mind with clarity at last. A sudden and simple idea happened to him in the form of a solution.

"My back is killing me. I think I'll take a shower, if you don't mind." Will stood and looked deeply into Hannibal's honey coloured eyes.

He didn't want to stare in such a telling way, but he couldn't help it as he didn't want to lose sight of his friend yet.

"Of course." Hannibal muttered.

"Hannibal..." He turned around for a second. "I haven't seen or talked to Jack since this morning. I haven't settled anything. I want you to know that."

Hannibal barely squinted his eyes in response.

"Thank you for your honesty."

Will nodded and disappeared the next second.

The former FBI profiler locked himself in the bathroom. He let the water of the shower run and sat on the toilet. He didn't care it came out ice cold. He wasn't going to take that one. Not because he wasn't feeling dirty, he felt all kinds of wrong, indeed. But he couldn't move at all once he closed his eyes and burst out crying. The noise of the water running hid any sob his hands covering his face couldn't. He felt cracked again.

He knew better than anyone else who Hannibal Lecter was. Knew perfectly what he had done to people who deserved it only according to their killer. He was aware that he had done it again while living in Florence and that as long as he lived, he would continue to do it. It was right in Will's hand to save lives, so many he didn't want to count them. But right in that moment he didn't care about those lives, he cared about Hannibal and he didn't want him to get caught. That made him feel worse than scum. That he was about to ignore how much good he could do to society if he took away Hannibal's freedom.

That was what it all was about. A chance to let Hannibal take the door without goodbyes, just ultimate good memories of the two of them. Perfectly polite. And Hannibal was beyond smart to calculate the risk and take the chance.

He was being good to Hannibal but he was failing everyone else. It took him a good 20 minutes to digest it and stop crying. He had done what he had done, out of love. He didn't chose to love Hannibal, it just happened to him and there wasn't such a thing as a way to unlove him now.

After those 20 minutes he got out, face wiped but red eyed. He wasn't expecting that once he was be back in the room, he'd find Hannibal more or less in the same position he had left him. The level of wine had gone down inside the bottle and Hannibal was still there.

"You're still here." Will murmured. "I thought you would leave."

Hannibal looked at him up and down, then up again.

"I thought you would take a shower."

Will closed his eyes and started shaking his head, on the edge of denial.

"You're not going to stop until one kills the other, are you?"

He ignored the question and scrutinized Will's face instead.

"Have you been crying? Come." He patted the bed. "Sit by me."

Did he have any alternative? Hannibal had just spoiled the only thing he had been able to come up with. He was done, ready to give up. He did what Hannibal told him and went silent.

"Why were you crying, Will?"

He couldn't answer straight after, so he made use of a pause his patient company was willing and understanding enough to grant him.

"Cause I can't do this." He ended up saying. "You know, the only reason why Jack didn't kill you this morning is so I would do it myself." His facial features twitched at the thought. He sure was emotionally unstable then. "I can't. Well maybe I can, but I don't want to kill you, Hannibal."

His listener turned to fill Will's glass.

"You don't need to get me drunk to kill me. Just do it fast." He reproached, not letting go of his usual dose of sarcasm.

The doctor gave him an almost judgmental look.

"I don't intend to kill you. Let alone how unlikely it would be for me to try such a thing if you aren't intending to _kill me_." He lifted his eyebrows, trying to make Will follow his logic. Then, he offerend the drink.

"Oh. What do you intend, then?"

Will sipped twice, nervously.

"Don't drink too fast. I need you sober enough to think."

Will nodded and held the gaze that was directed to him. He felt helpless not drunk.

"I want to present you a second chance. I don't do many of them." He was sounding beyond serious. "I made a determination and I'm not willing to go to prison any time soon. I'm leaving tonight." He took a deep breath through his nose and expelled the air the same way. "Will you run away with me?"

Will opened his mouth but Hannibal prevented him from speaking too soon.

"Give that a thought before you answer me, please."

And so he did.

 _"Will you slip away with him?"_ He heard Jack all over again.

_"Part of me will always want to."_

_"You have to cut that part out."_

Did he? For whom? Would he really gain more than he'd lose if he let Hannibal leave on his own again? He had already taken that option, lived a life without him and what had it ended up in? An active search for him all around the world. Now that he had found Hannibal and hadn't killed him, he couldn't say the aim of the search had actually been any other than crawling back to him. He ached like that for him. What if he stopped fearing the consequences so much? It wasn't like he had anything to lose. He had nothing at all beside Hannibal and his dogs.

"The dogs..." He said too low.

Hannibal chuckled. It couldn't be otherwise. Such a delicate moment and Will was thinking about dogs.

"I will make sure someone takes care of them meanwhile."

"Is that what you have planned next for Chiyoh? Taking care of my dogs?"

"Will, stop worrying about the dogs."

"Well, what do you expect _me_ to do?" His eyes widened as he said this.

"To trust me." Hannibal stretched his arm to bring Will's face closer to his as he spoke again. "I will take care of everything." His fingers tightened around his nape. "I will take care of you... if you let me."

They stared at each other from such a little distance the air one breathed probably came from othe other's lungs.

"Don't you crave change, Will?" He went from one eye to the other, intermittently.

"I crave all sorts of things." Will muttered.

"I can offer them to you if you only say yes." Hannibal was eager. 

Will was all he craved, all he had craved for years.

"Yes, you can." He rushed himself to admit, then found himself looking at the dramatic cupid bow in Hannibal's lips.

"Will..." Hannibal started again, about to say the next thing to try and convince him.

"Shut up."

Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it wasn't entirely it, or it wasn't the alcohol at all, but Will went for those lips. He was looking at them and the next thing he knew was he was kissing them hastily. None of them seemed to question the sharp turn for a second seeing as Will iniciated and Hannibal rapidly keeped track of it. Fuck Jack, fuck Alana, fuck everyone and everything they knew. In that very moment it was just the two of them.

Will pushed Hannibal's back carelessly against the bed. He was excited but also felt kind of angry for all sorts of reasons, so he took his current partner's lips in that same way as he straddled him.  
Hannibal was strong enough to cling Will to his body by surrounding his back with only one arm. His hand caressed him all the way up to Will's curls, then let his fingers get as lost as their tongues were getting inside each other's mouth. He took a bite of his lips, avid enough to make Will gasp harshly against his teeth.

"Easy with the teeth, filthy animal." Will confronted Hannibal's eyes now that they were finally at the same level as his.

Ok, part of it had definitely _something_ to do with the wine.

"Alcohol makes you rude, Will." He whispered as their nose touched.

"No, not rude." He drifted from Hannibal's lips to draw his jawline with wet kisses. "It makes me obscene. Do you eat the obscene, Hannibal?"

"I do. As often as I can." He panted, then moaned a little when the tip of Will's tongue parted from his jaw to the soft area behind his ear. "But not the same way I eat the rude."

Hannibal's grip had grown weaker as something else had grown harder, to the point it allowed Will to sit up again. He was smiling, they both were.

"You'll have to exemplify that for me on another occasion." He got off him and off the bed. "Get up, we have to leave before I regret."

"You won't regret, Will. I promise." Hannibal smiled as he raised, looking more victorious than Will had ever seen him.

 

 


	2. Lecter Dvaras

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hannibal and Will run away together. Next stop is Hannibal's past.  
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If something regarding the escape plans sounds inconsistent, I apologize. I truly tried to come up with the most plausible thing I could think of.  
> I wish to emphasize I tell my version of Hannibal's past, which sticks a lot to the version in the Hannibal rising film.  
> I also decided to finish this story with one of my first drabbles since it fitted just well and I thought it was a cute thing for me to do.

Will was elated. For a long while he had been convinced that he was doomed to live a life of self-loathing, repression and isolation. He knew parting with Hannibal would eventually translate into doing things that could initially increase that first feeling. Nonetheless, for once he was going to be himself and he wasn't going to be alone as a consequence. He hadn't thought of it thoroughly, not right in that moment. While still in the US, he had thought of running away with Hannibal in enough depth to know whatever he decided, he would always want to. Being aware of his wishes was the first thing to put him on the edge. Then, seeing Hannibal again and acknowledging the feelings that came to the surface gave him the one nudge he needed to walk through the door he'd open for Will. He wanted to do it, he just didn't know how.

"How we do it?" He was standing with his hands on his waist.

Euphoria was shifting into nervousness but he wanted to pretend it wasn't.

"Is la Polizia aware you are here?"

"Ehr, yes... Yes. I visited the foyer of you mind palace and the heart you left for us." Will smiled due to awkwardness rather than anything else.

"For you." Hannibal lowered his head a bit as he insisted on putting it the right way. "Did you like it?" He smiled partially showing his little teeth.

Will didn't know what to say.  _Like_  wasn't the word he'd use but he couldn't say it had bothered him either.

"I've... just agreed to run away with you now, Hannibal. I haven't quite acquired your taste yet."

"Of course. You have your own." He closed his mouth but the trace of his smile was still there.

"Can we leave the puns for later and get our hands on it?" He suggested scratching his eyebrow, avoiding all eye contact.

He used to go back to his old mannerisms when he was nervous or felt insecure.

"Sorry, this all has put me in a wonderful mood." He admitted while putting his clothes in place after the previous and brief passionate moment.

Right after, his smile faded and almost seemed to step back.

"Do they know where you're staying?"

"Maybe? I'm not sure." He shrugged. "Well, Jack doesn't know exactly where I stay, he just calls me on my phone."

"Did he call?"

"I put it in silence mode when I entered the Uffizi gallery then I forgot to turn the volume up. I Haven't checked. I didn't want to. I... Wanted to enjoy our time together." He lowered his voice at the end of the sentence before he looked for his phone in his jacket and unlocked to check. "He's called me twice." He swallowed.

"You should call back so he will not start looking for you and then find both of us."

"I'll call and tell him I didn't find you."

"He will believe you let me run."

"Then I'll tell him you ran... No, he will know. He knows I wanted to join you."

"That isn't relevant, to be frank. All we need by now is to distract him tonight."

"I'll call him and ask him to meet at a restaurant for dinner. I'll tell him I ran out of battery, just got to charge my phone now and that I'll tell him about today when we meet." He said, waiting for Hannibal's approval.

"Yes. Ask Jack to meet you at Ristorante La Giostra. It's one of my favourites and it's not close to this place, that will give us a little more advantage."

Will nodded, trying to assimilate what he had to tell Jack and how so his voice wouldn't betray him on the phone.

"What about la Polizia, Will? We cannot leave any loose end. We cannot take any risk beyond the calculated."

"I know. La polizia... I'm trying to think" He covered his forehead with his hand then closed his eyes to see more clearly the reasoning in his mind. "I'm not a fan of people I don't know having my personal number, so I gave them the number of this phone as a way to contact me." He pointed with his hand at the telephone on the night stand. "I mean, they would have a way of knowing where I'm staying if they wanted to." He deduced this with arched eyebrows and nodding with his head.

Hannibal became tense. Their names had appeared together on the papers. Their relationship wasn't a secret to anyone who was interested in the matter. It wouldn't be crazy for someone _particularly insterested_ to hypothesize that if Will was in Florence Hannibal could be just close. Someone who knew enough _would know_ to trace Will in order to find Hannibal.

Will needed no more to realize what was going through Hannibal's mind when his eyes started wandering around the room. He knew in that moment what he had to look for and so he did.

"We check the phone last." Hannibal whispered, prioritizing.

If there was a camera or a microphone or both indeed, then they were screwed. There would be no guarantee that they'd walk out of that room as free men or just alive.

It was a simple room, not many places to get checked but still took them a while. Scrutiny was indispensable. His training as an agent helped Will knowing where to look while Hannibal looked everywhere else. They were thorough but no trace of anything suspicious was found.

"For some reason I still don't feel safe." The tone in Will's voice had gone hostile.

He had been slightly shaking most of the time he was looking for a trap in his room. Everything was happening too fast. He wasn't comfortable at all, he felt clumsy and reckless, too far from meticulous and everything else the situation required him to be. 

Hannibal took a napkin from his pocket and picked up the phone with it.

"The bottle has your prints." Will noted. "And the glasses tell I had company."

"Clean it all off and make it tell you had none." He almost ordered. "I haven't touched anything else. But you."

Will wished that calm and coldness for himself while he did as asked.

"The phone isn't tapped." Hannibal announced. "I was hoping it was."

"Hoping?"

"It would have made it easier to give them a false lead, had they heard the false plans from your lips as you spoke them." He started to explain. "You're going to have to do this at reception, Will. We can only hope la Polizia or Jack will try to trace you through them."

"By asking them when exactly I checked out?"

"Yes. And then they will tell them the details you left behind before you left."

"What am I supposed to do?" Will frowned.

Hannibal was concise. He wanted for Will to call Jack first of all. Once it was successfully done, talk to reception and ask them if they could supply him with information about airlines flying to Hong Kong. He'd ask for a contact to any of the companies, lie about the line in his room not working and use their own phone down there. In that way he'd make sure a receptionist would be hearing all of it. He'd book two flights for next morning under the names of Will Graham and some other Hannibal provided -as his false identification- alongside with a credit card to pay the tickets and leave evidence of his intentions to fly, when and where to. There was also a reason why Hannibal chose Hong Kong. They had no extradition agreement with the US, which made it plausible to think two american citizens trying to escape justice would ultimately hide somewhere like that.

Hannibal stayed with Will while he rang Jack. Will's jaw was tight as heck and he was still on a rollercoster of emotions. The former had to hold the latter's hand when he went silent right after hearing Jack on the other line. Will looked at Hannibal who nodded once at him.

"Jack?"

"Will, it's you? Where the hell have you been?" Jack's voice went up.

"Long story. I didn't have my phone with me. Well I did, I just ran out of battery and couldn't use it until now I charged it." He felt both satisfied and disgusting for being able to tell Jack the exact lie he had planned to tell him. Hannibal's grip became tighter, encouraging him. God knows if he'd have been able to do it -lie to Jack- if it wasn't for Hannibal's presence. It reminded him of what was most important of all to Will. "Listen, there's a restaurant close to Piazza del Duomo we should meet at. We could meet for dinner and talk there. Yes?"

Will gave Jack the details once he heard the latter sigh and agree.

Hannibal looked and smiled fondly at Will. He cupped the side of his face with his hand and pulled their foreheads together.

"It may not be easy at first but it will be worthy. You'll see, Will."

"There's no turn back, Hannibal." Will muttered, with a bitter taste in his mouth.

"Actually right now is your last chance to turn back and walk away. You can still meet Jack and tell him whatever you please."

Will shook his head. A little too much wine might had encouraged him to give such a fast turn to the direction of his life but once fear and insecurity took over everything else... He realized plainly what he was about to do and it seemed so very risky. Nevertheless, the heart wanted what it wanted so he reminded himself once again that chancing the life he currently had wasn't risking much at all.

"No. That isn't really an option for me. I'm not going back to the life I've had these past months. Least of all knowing I rejected a second chance to stop living a life I hate."

"Atta boy." Hannibal breathed through his nose righ over Will's and the latter smiled at the sensation.

Having Hannibal close was convincing enough to do anything. It all was fine when he was that close to Will. His problems were no more.

"What's the actual next stop?" Will finally asked.

"I will tell you that later. There are a few things I have to collect. Meanwhile go down to reception and do what we have agreed you would do." Hannibal drew away a little to look intensively into Will's eyes. 

"No..."

He didn't want Hannibal to leave the room on his own but that room wasn't either a safe place for him to stay in. He wasn't sure a safe place existed at all. Maybe he was paranoid but he felt overwhelmed by the fear there could be anyone out there waiting to catch him.

"We will need it." He consulted the time on his wrist watch. "I' will meet with you in 25 minutes at the back door of the hotel. Will you manage to leave through that exist? We are not to be easily seen."

"You better be there in 25 minutes. Don't make me go on your rescue." He tried to make himself smile just to get rid of some tension.

"You worry too much, Will. This would be much easier if you allowed yourself to relax some more." He walked towards the door of the room.

"Well, I haven't ever done this." Will accompanied him.

Hannibal turned for a second to stare at Will and try to help out with an easy reminder:

"I have. Most of my life. Put your trust in me."

"I already have." Will nodded and swallowed as he wanted but _couldn't_ just shake his angst off whenever convenient.

Hannibal gave him his back to open the door but Will pushed it again. The former looked over his shoulder to find the latter's face just an inch away from his.

"Be careful, Hannibal. Please." Will whispered these words with his forehead pressed over the other man's shoulder. "Whatever we are -I don't feel it's the right moment to think about it now-..." He used some seconds to finish the sentence." I don't want to lose it.

Will was able to hear Hannibal's deep breath. The latter turned somewhat more to kiss Will in the head and then opened the door.

"I will always be with you. Even in those moments when you don't want me to."

No other words were exchanged before he walked out.

Will was thankful he hadn't had anything to eat as he was so nervous he felt like he was going to throw up any moment. Will was no chicken, he wasn't a coward and he had proved to himself before that he could be as cold blooded as needed. Still, the fear of losing Hannibal once he was back in Will's life was stronger than anything else Will had in him. Everything except for always trying to recover him. His only fear was losing Hannibal in a way he couldn't take him back again.

He tried to shut down the thinking as much as he could and went down to do what he was supposed to.

* * *

 

It didn't take them very long until they were on the last train to Aukštaitija, Hannibal's hometown. None of them thought they were ever going to be back in that place but in that moment it felt the safest of all. Hannibal hadn't shared with anyone but Will the most personal details regarding his past. Everyone knew he was lithuanian but no one had ever bothered learning from which part of the country. Even if his birth certificate could bring the FBI closer -if everything went as planned- anyone looking for them would be busy for some time looking in the wrong corner of the world. They both knew they weren't going to stay anywhere forever but they had to go somewhere to start with and that place was the Lecter castle for now.

"They may find out we didn't take that plane."Will started almost as soon as he sat. "Actually it's highly possible that they do exactly so. Jack is not a fool."

"Firstly, they will have to find out which flight we took in order to check the boarding list. All we needed was time to go somewhere else, Will. Distracting them with false leads gives us extra time. Jack will start looking for you tonight but he doesn't know where you were staying. He will have to figure out that first. He will insist to talk to the last person on reception you spoke to, then he will learn about your plans to fly to Hong Kong. Next, he will be figuring out which flight and last, he will need to check the boarding list. Even supposing he _will_  immediately identify this as the set up it is, all that I just explained still gives us plenty of time. But if you are in the mood for a more optimistic thinking, he might even stop to consider whether if we didn't take the flight on purpose or someone prevented us from doing so. Remember the price on my head."

The train started moving only then. Will didn't say a thing. He felt as if he couldn't think anymore. Instead, he convinced himself they had taken care of the situation as much as they had been able to. There was no use overworrying about what would happen with whatever was beyond their control.

He stared at his false identification card. There was no one else on the wagon but the two of them.

"Where did you get my picture from?" He asked out of the blue.

"You are the man who didn't kill all those people."

"No, you are." Will interrupted, flipping it to check the back side.

It looked just legit.

"Your picture is an easy one to find."

He pushed aside all the memories that conversation could have brought as a more interesting thought came forward.

"You didn't get this done just now. You only went to pick it up."

"I always had the hope this day would come. After deceiving me, I still took it with me in hope you would come back to reclaim it eventually."

 

The trip took a day and the closer they were getting to their destination, the more quiet Hannibal would become. The intimacy between them had almost faded and it felt as if Will was travelling with a stranger.

Will had woken up to use the toilet in the middle of the night. When he checked the bottom bed of the bunk in their wagon, he saw Hannibal's eyes sparkling in the dark. His eyesight was fixed on the bed Will was sleeping in. He wouldn't blink, not even when Will stood there staring at him.

"Sleep. Everything is fine." He murmured.

"Hannibal..."

But Hannibal turned to face the wall pretending he would sleep now. It was not the moment to force things out though.

By the time they got there, there was no trace of that victorious semblance he had adquired the moment Will agreed to run away with him. Something much more powerful than the present he had always wanted was overshadowing Hannibal's mood. Will knew exactly what that was: His past.

* * *

 

The gates of the Lecter estate squeaked briefly as they got hit by a gust of wind. It felt as if the land was coming back to life. As if the shields that read  _Lecter Dvaras_ and the vegetation growing around them knew  _he_  was there.

Will had been there a few days ago. It was unthinkable to imagine he'd be back but so was that he'd escape with Hannibal. Yet both things happened. Nevertheless, nothing was about Will anymore. Not in that moment.

Hannibal was standing still at a certain distance, acknowledging inch by inch the gates he also thought he'd never walk through again. That was only the tip of the iceberg that represented the reasons behind the change in his behaviour. That was just the beginning of all he was dreading to face again after so long.

"We have to go in, Hannibal." Will shallowed, uncertain of what his reaction would be.

He put his hand on the other man's back for some seconds, then approached the gates to climb them up one more time.

"There is a key for the lock underneath that rock beside your right feet." Hannibal pronounced once Will's left one was already up.

It made Will feel stupid but it didn't matter to him as much as how Hannibal felt.

"This place belongs to you." Will handed the key to the owner of the estate for him to open its gates. "I know well enough the reasons why you don't want to be here. The rooms filled with screams in your memory palace originated here... or somewhere close. But you don't have to visit all rooms at a time. Use the corridors were the screams don't echo to go from one place to the other. Stay there for a while and try to listen to the music in them."

That was brand new for Will, having to direct Hannibal's train of thought. Having to help Hannibal was new. It had always been the latter who had orchestrated the way the other was to feel. Reciprocity had began now that they walked on the same level.

“Music will help dissolve your perplexities and purify your character and sensibilities. And in time of care and sorrow, will keep a fountain of joy alive in you.” Hannibal quoted someone Will didn't recognize but he nodded in approval.

Hannibal closed his eyes after he dedicated some seconds to examine the heavy key itself. He was trying to assimilate the best he could how real his past had been and the fact that it was becoming also a part of his present. Once he removed the chains he grabbed the bars of the gates and pushed them in. The symbolism of Will standing beside him, helping him push didn't pass unnoticed by him. If it wasn't for Will, Hannibal wouldn't have had that much strength.

Will knew one had to walk through the family cemetery before getting to Chiyoh's hunting cabin, which was closer to the entrance than the castle. He wondered if the core of the screaming in Hannibal's memory palace was Mischa's resting place or the place where she was killed. Probably both constituted a source for the same nightmare.

A light mist extended there, spreading through the tombs like the corporeal souls of the dead lying on the ground. Once they were close enought to see everything the mist had covered some steps behind, Hannibal's pace slowed down. Will could see it, so Hannibal -who was way more familiar with it- could see it too. The back of Mischa's gravestone was finally clear.

"I bet this is the room you wanted to visit last." Will showed his natural empathy after Hannibal stopped walking, already standing among the tombs of his relatives.

"This is the last place I would like to visit in life." Hannibal admitted.

"It's also here where your childhood took place. What feelings does visiting this estate bring?"

"Is this therapy?"

"It's whatever you need it to be."

Their roles had switched for a brief moment.

"You are not a therapist." Hannibal pointed out, his gaze still on the stone meters away.

The way he said it didn't sound like he was trying to shut Will out of his mind. On the contrary, he seemed to be waiting to hear a good reason to allow himself to open up.

"I'm not. I'm your..." What term would possibly define it? "Nakama." He tried that one, hoping it would express much more than  _friend_. "Nakamas should know everything about each other. I cannot stand in the same place with you, at the same level, if I don't see what you see. I don't want you to be alone here, Hannibal."

After a while, he gave an answer to that.

"All sorrows can be born if you put them in a story. Do you want to hear my story, Will?" He turned his face to look at him for the first time that day.

He looked expressionless but underneath the façade, every existing feeling was revolving inside of him, kicking the walls of his skin in an attempt to get out. Will nodded and gave Hannibal time to bring himself to start.

"I was introduced to Mischa at the age of 6.  Two years later my family and I left this estate in the wake of civil conflicts. We found shelter in a lodge in the forest not far from here. When I was 11 years old my family died by a bombing. Only Mischa and I survived. I tried to feed her however I could but eventually we started running out of provisions. Then an extremely cold winter came along. A group of looters invided the lodge and held us captive for long days. Snow was all over the place and food became scarce for everyone in the region. Those days we experienced true hunger and dread whereas our captors began suffering delusions due to the withdrawal. They would scream at each other and fight with each other over the food they didn't have." Hannibal made a pause. His sight was lost all over again while he was probably visualizing the horror he and his sister lived as he was talking about it. "It didn't take long until they found a way to satiate their hunger. Mischa was affected by pneumonia, they said she was going to die either way." The closer he got to the end of the story, the harder it was for him to tell it. But Will needed to hear it. "I tried to thwart them but I wasn't strong enough. All I could do was scream and kick until they made me vanish. When I woke up, still numb, I was being fed some hot soup." Hannibal's jaw tighten and his features seemed to convulse. "She is the reason why I happened, Will."

"You were introduced to cannibalism by force. Yet, unconsciously." With goosebumps and speaking slowly, Will tried to help him give his story closure.

"Yes. My first act of human flesh consuming was not something I decided myself. The murder of Mischa destroyed my faith in God and in justice. It haunted and traumatized me more than it traumatized all of you to learn what I was putting in your plates."

"You were serving poetic justice." Will inferred.

"Yes. I've been doing so all along." His eyes were laid on Will again. He had seen Hannibal hurt before, which helped him recognize the pain in his countenance again. "When I grew up I went back to the old lodge to find Mischa's remainings still sitting in the bottom of a small bathtub where they boiled her. I brought her home again to bury her. In her name, I took revenge of each one of them in a different way."

"You did what you had to." Will gave in both to Hannibal and himself.

He couldn't but admit if he had had a sister taken away from him, he wouldn't have just sat down to mourn. Least of all knowing who had taken her life. He would have killed too and gloated over his acts as well.

"I always have. I loved Mischa dearly, with as much devotion as you loved Abigail with. Probably more as emotions appear intensified in children.”

They looked at each other. Will was moved but he knew he couldn't let Hannibal see too much of it for the simple reason that Hannibal was about to snap.

“You loved her like you haven’t loved ever again. It’s hard to imagine what you would be like today if this hadn’t happened to you.”

“Mischa’s death happened to me but everything else didn’t happen to me. I made it happen, _I_ _happened_.” He insisted with coldness. “It might help you understand me but you cannot justify what I am _today_ by any of this. There is no mental disorder I present, this is what I am and the only way I can be. Eating my sister didn’t do this to me. You didn’t become a cannibal the way I am so just because of what I fed you. Or do you see yourself as a cannibal, Will?”

He was irritated. Once that he had revealed his beginnings he didn’t want to be justified, he wanted to be seen and approved the way he was. It felt as if he was giving Will an ultimatum for him to fully accept Hannibal for once and all or face whatever else choice was left.

“My story isn’t over yet. I know I’m not a cannibal today. I don’t know what I may become tomorrow molded by my future experiences. Yet, your story is different. I’m not angry at God the way you are. You still hate him, defy him. All of your life you have been trying to anger God by outdoing him with your _acts of justice_ the way he angered you when he let this happen. In my case I ate the victims I was trying to pay justice to. That only made me angry with _you_."They shared a silence before Will spoke again." But I love you more than you ever loved God and I’ve forgiven you. You haven’t forgiven God.

“Nor will I.” A sudden tear rolled down his face followed by a second one.

“I don’t believe you have to. I’m not a priest.” Will sighed, looking at what surrounded them for a second before he directed his attention back to Hannibal. “But something I believe is… you need a moment with your sister and that might be more therapeutical now than forgiving God. I think it's time you face it as the man you are today."

Will could see all the ghosts Hannibal carried with him just by staring inside of his eyes. They were pulling him back more and more every second. He had talked about being haunted in past tense but he still was. Will took his hand and incited him to start walking again. He guided Hannibal in front of the stone that said:  _Mischa. Mylima._ It meant beloved in Lithuanian. It took some long seconds for Hannibal to bring himself to look at it.

Will grabbed him by the end of his coat sleeve and got close to him. So close that he could appreciate why Hannibal had always loathed Will’s aftershave. He smelled like he had just descended from one of those frescoes he loved so much. A fallen divinity, covered in scratches and bruises so long after his fall.

“I’ll be waiting on the fence back there.” He referred to the one behind them. Didn’t want to make him feel watched. "I don't want to justify you or bring you closer to any normality standard differing a bit from your own." He whispered almost on his ear. "I've seen you and I... accept you as you are. All of you."

Then he left a kiss on Hannibal’s frozen cheek and the man turned his face instantly, provoking their nose to touch.

“Thank you, Will.” He muttered.

Their eyes were at such a little distance he could even tell what was behind them. That hadn’t been the courtesy Hannibal was so fond of using. That was Hannibal Lecter wholeheartedly thanking Will, acknowledging the good Will did to him. Even if it was for a brief moment, it was Will who influenced Hannibal and that made him feel inexplicably powerful and good, good over everything else.

He wished to kiss him twice as passionately has he had at his hotel room but he wasn’t going to. Definitely not in front of Mischa’s tomb. He would not disrespect any of the two Lecters like that so he did as he told him.

He was still walking away when he heard Hannibal speak, after some silence.

“ _Sveiki, Mischa… Kaip sekasi?_ ”

Will felt like he appreciated better than ever before the beauty in Hannibal. He was getting to know a part of him he hadn’t ever shown to anyone else. Hearing him speak a few words in his native language made Will realize how much was still to discover about the man and he was eager to. He also wondered if anyone had ever been curious about who Hannibal had been before they met him. He had always given the impression of being so grounded in Baltimore that probably no one ever realized how much he had behind his back.

He had stood leaning on the fence for a while, too far to be able to tell whether if Hannibal was still talking to Mischa or had stopped. The cold was sticking to his bones as he asked himself how much more would it take and how would Hannibal behave after that. He anticipated an isolating episode coming as a way to fight back to stability. Nevertheless, he promised himself if he had gone there with Hannibal it hadn’t been for Will to leave him on his own. Now that it was about reciprocity, just like Hannibal had told him back in Florence, he was going to be there even when he didn’t want him to.

He closed his eyes for a brief moment, telling himself as well it wasn’t that cold and that he could still wait a while more before starting to shake. Next thing he found out when he opened them was that Hannibal just felt kneeling on the floor.

His first reaction was fear, thinking someone had shot him but he had heard no sound at all. He hadn’t been hurt, he _was hurt_ and at that point, he couldn't stand back there watching Hannibal break.

As soon as Will arrived the spot before Mischa’s gravestone he got on his knees too -in a painful way- and almost forced Hannibal to accept his embrace. He put his arms around the Lithuanian’s head and grabbed his coat in his fist. He had seen Hannibal go through one of the bitterest moments but never seen him tremble. Least of all the way he was doing it right then. His temple seemed to vibrate against Will’s chest and all he felt he could do was hug him tighter, rest his face over Hannibal’s head and eventually rub his back. Words felt unnecessary. They had told each other enough. Literally all that was left for Will to offer was his arms and his shoulder for Hannibal to cry on. The latter gasped from holding his breath and tears for longer than he should have. The way he kept gasping for air told Will that Hannibal had been at the verge of choking on his own pent-up emotions. Tangible or not, they had been blocking his throat up until he allowed himself to fully breakdown and sob in his companion’s embrace. Now he could feel Hannibal’s own desire to be held as he pressed his forehead harder on Will’s chest –so hard it seemed he wanted to go _through_ it- and his hands grabbed his clothes from the sides. All the time he hid his face while he cried around a good ten minutes, non-stop. Even after Will started hearing a nearly normal breathing pattern he still didn’t move.

The younger had his eyes closed and jaw tighten. He didn't want for Hannibal to feel such pain but he _did_ regardless and all Will could help him with was the way to deal with that pain.

Instead of letting go of his grasp, Hannibal slid his hands to Will’s back. The latter started caressing the blonde hair and felt its softness with his lips. He kissed Hannibal in the head twice before he started worrying the former could eventually feel he was making himself look way too helpless for his taste. He could behave proud like a cat and that was in his nature.

“There’s something I want to show you if you feel more or less ready to leave now.” Will suggested, purposely talking as if he wasn't holding a _naked_ Hannibal in his arms.

The older remained silent for some more seconds before drawing away. Will hadn’t expected such an immediate eye contact to happen but it did and it was piercing him. He felt some part that was still very alive in Hannibal warned him to never dare to use his weaknesses against him. Never dare to reject any rare gift he gave him again.  There was no point in saying "I won't break your heart again, do be scared to share it with me." Because Hannibal didn't want any of Will's words, he needed his acts and only time could help him prove his intentions.

They stood together and headed the castle.

* * *

 

No light from the outside sneaked through the old dungeon so they carried a torch with them and lit up the place.

In their eyes, the body of the one looter Hannibal had made Chiyoh keep for decades appeared, arranged as a bigger depiction of the fireflies that still danced around the hanging tableau.

They looked into the mirrors that composed the wings of the firefly-man to find their own sights looking back at them.

"You said Chiyoh took his life but she didn't do this" Hannibal gathered, still analyzing the work.

"I did."

"Did you do this for me?" Hannibal got closer to Will’s design, avid to stare from a different perspective.

"I did it for Mischa. I thought you weren't coming back, so I did what I thought you would do. I saw with your eyes."

"What did your eyes see?"

"Your heart. It look me a long trip to Lithuania to accept you had one."

"It only took you to open your eyes." Hannibal took a deep breath despite his sealed lips. Then looked at Will. "What do you see now?"

"Beginnings."

"Mine or yours?" He asked as he walked to stand right in front of Will.

"Ours."

They smiled looking at the light of a hundred fireflies reflecting in each other's eyes.

“I’m proud of you, Will. I hope you can feel proud of me soon, one of these days.”

“I’ll be happy enough if you start by offering me something to eat.” He suggested in an almost festive mood. “I’m starving.”

Hannibal smiled almost certain -as much as still just wishing- Will’s appetite and his would become one very soon. After all, they had begun to blur but not to disappear. Ahead of them was only their becoming as one.


End file.
